The Tooth Fairy vs. Mr Perez, The Little Rat

There´s always going to be cultural references and language stuff that you won´t be familiar with if you haven´t been brought up in a country. For example, I blame my inability to master the past and subjunctive tenses on my parents not having read me bedtime stories in Spanish (an unreasonable complaint given the fact that they don´t speak Spanish but nevertheless....)

Until I watched the movie the Tooth Fairy on a bus journey to Granada (a.k.a Rompedientes o Hada por accidente) I didn´t realise that the Tooth Fairy didn´t bring the money in Spain but, in fact, Ratoncito Perez. Cute! There´s a museum in his honour on Calle Arenal, go visit, it´s suitably random (and free if you just visit his statue on the ground floor) I brought my boyfriend but children would probably be more appropriate!

Jugglers at traffic lights

Love these guys

Cerrado por vacaciones

I'm the only person in Madrid working this month... the city is on holidays.

Top 5 things I won’t miss about Madrid

Today is my 2 year anniversary in Madrid, how time flies! Unfortunately time is also flying me away from here pretty soon and, depressed as I am, I decided to make a list of the things I won’t miss to cheer myself up. Generally this blog is overwhelming positive so please excuse the quick sashay into the world of the negative. Promise to post a top 5 of things I will miss soon.

So here goes, The top 5 things I won’t miss about Madrid

Shop Assistants

Nuff said really, but just to elaborate in case you haven’t experienced Spanish customer service, it can be boiled down to one word – Shit.

People who can’t walk in a straight line

I’ve never heard anyone else complain about this but it seems to me that people here can’t walk in a straight line. The pavements are an obstacle of slow moving, careening human traffic. Pick a side and stick to it, jeez. Should I ever rise to power in Spanish politics (improbable) I will be implementing a 4 lane system on the pavements – 2 lanes per direction with a dedicated fast lane on both sides.

When they turn the escalator off in La Latina.

Worst. Climb. Ever.

People staring at me in metro

Though ironically, one of my favourite things in the metro is looking at the people around me as I am occasionally the tallest person in the metro. Amazing considering my statuesque height of 5,4. That said, though I enjoy a good gawp, I cannot stand people staring at me in metro. Yes, I have milk bottle skin, blond hair and blue eyes and I can see how that might be weird for you but seriously, have you seen the dwarves all around us?!

Oh My God / Hissing

Random groups of men who say ‘oh my god’ or hiss at me as I walk past. Yes, that’s how you will get my attention and friendship sirs. Jerks.

Dear RENFE

HIRE A DECENT TRANSLATOR!
That is all. (see also - This week's bout of Spanglish is sponsored by Renfe)

Man toilets and woman toilets?? Whatever happened to Ladies and Gents? Or simply Women and Men?

This picture doesn't really tell a thousand words...

...but it made me laugh

Le Cool Madrid

My favourite thing about Thursday mornings in work is when Le Cool Madrid arrives and I can change my desktop background for the week. It truly is the little things that count :P

The 'heavies' of Gran Vía

Around Europe in 80 minutes

Parque de Europa in Torrejon de Ardoz is absolutely hilarious. Like Disney World but, I dunno, less music and more European monuments...

Visit. It even has a zip line swing. 3,50 a go. Bargain.

Shake your tail feather

Things you see in Madrid parks... Drug dealers, runners, rollerbladers, couples doing unspeakable things in the grass,and.... peacocks?

Lavapiés

Really starting to appreciate this area now I live beside it. That said, I brought my mate for walk through the  neighbourhood over the weekend and in the space of 3 minutes she saw a man poo-ing, a drug deal and a man rooting through a bin for clothes. Note to self - might not be a place to bring visitors. Excellent photo exhibition with some cool wall art just off Ronda de Valencia though.

You're simply the best...

Better than all the rest, better than anyone, yada yada. Damn catchy tune.

I didn't think I was (that) influenced by packaging...

But I HAD to buy the ironing board that came with this.

AWOL

I'm back! Excuse the absence. I've been moving gaff, then living a life free of internet and television. Loving living in La Latina, plus the apartment has some inneresting artwork courtesy of the owner (the Goya postcard is my artistic contribution :P) However, luckily, or perhaps unluckily, Ecuador has figured out how to break into the internet network of my neighbours. (Shhhhhhh) Re-connected to the world!

http://www.aroideas.com/

Another bathroom / Make Bike Not Car

No toilet roll in this one either (see previous entry)

This week's bout of Spanglish is sponsored by Renfe

Well I guess it is phonetically correct...

Sexism is alive and well in Spain...

FORLADY Kitchen Furniture
Hmmm....

Flash Mob

Whilst queuing at Starbucks in Principe Pío yesterday I was lucky to catch the beginning of a flash mob courtesy of the Coro Gospel de Madrid. What a talented bunch of people.

Unfortunately I didn't get around to making a vid or snapping a pic, but my Youtube search threw lots of other Madrid flashmobs... Check out some of the better ones...  

 

Corona Beach Hotel

With everyone from the Irish Times to Perez Hilton covering the garbage hotel that had pride of place in Callao last week, I thought I'd stick up my picture of the hotel under construction.

Constructed of 12 tonnes of garbage swept ashore on Europes dirtiest beaches, it certainly wouldn't be a pleasant experience to stay there but it's a good commentary on waste.

Ehhhhhh

Another odd Madrid dog image courtesy of @bernardmc's travels around Madrid last Wednesday.

Creepy

A dog is for life not just for Christmas

Although if I got a life size porcelain dog for Christmas I'd probably do the same...